The Numbers Game: Why High Volume Approaches Don't Guarantee Dates
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There seems to be a natural progression as you travel down the path of pick-up. You get practice approaching and chatting with women and eventually get good at it, and more girls give you their contact info, such as number or email. But then you will get many who won't respond when you contact them. It's like you become cool enough to give a phone number to but not cool enough to go out with. All part of the learning curve I used to tell myself. And this gave rise to tons of analysis and over-analysis. For example, I would write posts on the seduction forum asking other guys to post their statistical results based on how many numbers of women they got versus how many they went out with. Or, which was better, email or phone. It seemed like a good idea to ask but it's such a variable, and as such focus on practical steps and clear communication no one could give me a satisfactory response. So I had to figure it out on my own.
Understanding Low-Quality Number Collection
There were times I got so invested in getting numbers I overlooked the fact that they were low-quality, meaning the girls weren't that interested. They were likely just being social by giving me their number. In fact, I was once in a cab with this woman who was complaining to her friends why she gave her number to this guy she wasn't interested in: "Why oh why did I give my number to that guy! I don't want him to call me!" It was well known that women often live the moment with no regard to the consequences. When you realize that texting etiquette and how you follow up matters far more than the number itself, your approach to contact becomes much more strategic.
The Kino Test And Anti-Slut-Defense Dynamics
Over time I got a good sense of the women that wouldn't flake on me and actually wanted to see me again. The community outlined simple (and not so simple) things you can do to test a woman if she is interested, like touching her to see if she touches you back. This was called Kino. And is a good test but supposedly there are also times when a woman won't touch you or show physical interest because her friends are around and doesn't want to appear "easy". This was called ASD (Anti-Slut-Defense). So in this case you had to pay closer attention to her body language, and maybe touch her when she knows her friends aren't looking. It became like a minefield to navigate through and caused all sorts of endless second guessing like, if her friends weren't around she would have been mine, or how does a girl show interest when her friends are around and she knows she can't look too easy and maybe knows that you know. How to win dates and influence women requires understanding these social dynamics and responding appropriately. Stuff like that. Admittedly I analyzed more than most, and in a place like the seduction community where overanalysis is common, I occasionally had guys telling me to stop thinking so much.
